Moments of Integrity – February 28, 1999
Sometimes, in order to get along with those around us, we find ourselves in situations where we need to compromise. And yet, there are also times when we need to take a stand, define our position, and refuse to back down. When it comes to questions of personal integrity—to those beliefs which most define us—we need to be willing to say, forcefully and firmly: “I will not compromise on this issue. This is my position.” And then accept whatever consequences result.
Such moments may be fairly rare. We should always be willing to listen to the opinions of others, to cultivate an open mind and a flexible approach to problem solving. But those moments which most define us are those where we are forced to choose, once and for all, where we stand. For Sir Thomas More, such a defining moment came when he was asked to take an oath that violated everything he believed in. By refusing to take such an oath, More was imprisoned, his lands confiscated, his life placed in peril. Yet, when asked by his daughter to free himself and simply take the oath, his reply speaks to us all: “When a man takes an oath, he holds himself in his own hands. Like water. And if he opens his fingers again, he needn’t hope to find himself again.”1 More’s stalwart refusal to violate his own sense of self by taking a false oath led to his execution, but left us a great legacy of courage and integrity.
Most likely our individual moments of truth won’t be so dramatic. Perhaps we’ll define our own integrity in matters of small proportion: in a decision not to run a red light at an intersection or a decision to return extra change given us by a store clerk. A promise made to a child, a commitment made to a neighbor are, after all, a kind of oath. And when we swear it, we hold ourselves in our own hands. Do we tell the truth as we know it and bravely face the consequences? Do we act according to our best moral judgment?
As we hold to our best sense of who we are, we can find a firm ground to stand on, and agree not to budge from it. Only then do we build our own lives on the rock of personal honor and the deepest, truest sense of personal integrity.
Program #3628
1Robert Bolt, A Man for All Seasons (New York: Vintage Books, 1960), 81.