Parents Must Be Parents – Sunday, September 12, 1954
On this question again of freedom to do what we want to do: young people sometimes ask, “Why do parents worry so much, and watch us so closely, and repeat so often the same precautions?
We are able to take care of ourselves. Why don’t they leave us alone and let us learn in our own way?” In short, it seems that young people want to know why parents must act like parents! (Perhaps we shouldn’t pass this without saying, parenthetically, that society is safer, and so are youth, and happier also, when parents more conscientiously play the part of parents—and look upon parenthood as the most important obligation in life.)
The fact is, that there is no acceptable way for parents to free themselves from parental responsibility. They have no choice if they do their duty before the law, before society, and before God. They must be concerned; they must counsel; they must caution; they must pass on to their children the benefit of their own experience and of others.
In other words, they must act like parents—or be derelict in their duty. This brings to mind the poignant comment of a girl who heard her companions complaining of their parents—complaining of being counseled and cautioned, of being asked where they were going, who they were going with, and of being told at what hour they should be in—to all of which she said: “You should be grateful to have someone think enough of you to care where you’re going and when you will be back. My parents don’t seem to care.” This sobered those who had joined in the general complaining—as it should.
We may send the children to school or into other supervised activities, and be physically free of them for a few hours, or even for many months—but still the primary responsibility for children must rest upon parents. Some parents will do their work better than others—some with more understanding, some with less irritation, some seemingly with less obvious intrusion; some teachings may seem tiresome; some at times may even seem unessential—but parents must play the part of parents, and children must recognize the part that parents must play and be willing to listen and learn.
So far as parents and children are concerned, there is no honorable way by which they can free themselves from their continuing obligations to one another.
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September 12, 1954
Broadcast Number 1,308