…but marriage is another matter… – Sunday, May 31, 1959
Last week, it may be recalled, we closed with a quotation from an ancient Roman writer: “Do you expect, forsooth,” he said, “that a mother will hand down to her children principles which differ from her own?”1 This compelling question could well be asked by all who contemplate marriage, and who are wise enough to look beyond the present, to the time when there are children, and to all the hoped-for years of life—and the everlastingness of life.
It is possible for two people to enjoy the company of each as to the other in many ways, with wide differences of preference and opinion, of habits, of teaching, of training, of background and belief. Indeed, a diversity of friendships is one of life’s real enrichments.
To learn of the goodness of those who are unlike—of their worth, their sincerity, their good hearts, their good minds, their good company—is rich and rewarding. It is wonderful to have a wide range of choice friends who can be counted on—of friends who can be enjoyed and loved and trusted.
So much for the richness of friendship. But as to marriage—marriage is very much another matter. In the partnership of two parents a unity of purpose is so vitally essential, for it involves the training, the teaching of children, the molding of character, the sense of values, the foundations, the interpretation, the very purpose of life, of its ultimate and everlasting meaning in all its essence. And in a matter so momentous, how could there be a clear course, unless objectives and convictions were compatible, or unless one or the other or, both set their convictions aside—which is hardly a safe or sure foundation for best understanding or for setting a sure and certain course.
“Observe how soon, and to what a degree, a mother’s influence begins to operate!”2 suggested one writer, to which another added: “The mother in her office holds the key of the soul; and she it is who stamps the coin of character.”3 Life is largely a reflection of what people believe, plus what they have the courage and conviction to stand for, to live for.
And this observation, anciently offered, has much in it for reflection for those who will make the momentous decision of marriage: Do you expect anyone—could you expect anyone—could you expect fathers or mothers—to hand down to their children principles which differ from their own.
1 Juvenal, Satires. Sat. vi, 1. 239.
2 Mrs. Sigourney
3 Old Play
May 31, 1959
Broadcast Number 1,554